Too much ... far less ...
Jul. 24th, 2004 09:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
scottishlassThis year is not a very good one ... first my grandfather, now an aunt. Ppl from my family are dying ... It is such a strange feeling to see so many passing away of my family, people who have been with me my whole life, humans that taught me, accompanied me, loved me. And now they are gone.
I know this is the normal way of things, we are born and we will die eventually but somehow everyone clings to the childlike fantasy that your family will live forever, that they are invincible and immortal.
Last year and this year I learn the hard way, people who have accompanied on my way from baby to adulthood have been gone. It hurts, and nothing will be as it was before. It's strange to be suddenly realize that I will be the last of my family. I don't have any children and with me - when I die one day - all the anecdotes, the stories and the history of my family will die with me. All around me my relatives get older, my parents ... my aunts and uncles ... even my cousins ... and with me the youngest, I will probably be the one who remains.
Oh Rose thou are sick
The invisible worm
That flies in the night,
In the howling storm,
Has found out thy bed
Of Crimson joy:
And his dark, secret love
Does thy life destroy
I know this is the normal way of things, we are born and we will die eventually but somehow everyone clings to the childlike fantasy that your family will live forever, that they are invincible and immortal.
Last year and this year I learn the hard way, people who have accompanied on my way from baby to adulthood have been gone. It hurts, and nothing will be as it was before. It's strange to be suddenly realize that I will be the last of my family. I don't have any children and with me - when I die one day - all the anecdotes, the stories and the history of my family will die with me. All around me my relatives get older, my parents ... my aunts and uncles ... even my cousins ... and with me the youngest, I will probably be the one who remains.
Oh Rose thou are sick
The invisible worm
That flies in the night,
In the howling storm,
Has found out thy bed
Of Crimson joy:
And his dark, secret love
Does thy life destroy
