Sunday - all gone again
Apr. 9th, 2006 08:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
scottishlassI don't know what it is .. it is Sunday night and all I do is watching some documentary of pre-historic Varna. Jeesh ... where have my wild days gone? Did it all end when I turned 35?
Where has the flirtatious Goth-Lady gone? I guess I lost it last December when I finally parted with the one thing that still reminded me of the good ol' days ... my nose ring. I had worn it for 21 years and then I thought it wouldn't be good for my hobby, so I got rid of it. But still - 5 months - I catch myself putting my fingertip against the left side of my nose where the ring was. I feel naked, exposed and somehow old.
I guess. Today, when I was at my in-law's home I realized that I have become something I never wanted to be ... part of the establishment.
I am married.
I work in education.
I have a pet that substitues as a kid.
*sigh*
But then again I could be living a different life, either alone or with a husband that drinks and abuses, so I won't be complaining too much. But it is funny to see that I have become what my parents always wanted and not what I thought I wanted. But it is okay, I mean I have a good life, I love my husband and he loves me, and Chica fills up a part of my heart that I never thought existed.
But why do I feel like my life's just rushing by?
Where has the flirtatious Goth-Lady gone? I guess I lost it last December when I finally parted with the one thing that still reminded me of the good ol' days ... my nose ring. I had worn it for 21 years and then I thought it wouldn't be good for my hobby, so I got rid of it. But still - 5 months - I catch myself putting my fingertip against the left side of my nose where the ring was. I feel naked, exposed and somehow old.
I guess. Today, when I was at my in-law's home I realized that I have become something I never wanted to be ... part of the establishment.
I am married.
I work in education.
I have a pet that substitues as a kid.
*sigh*
But then again I could be living a different life, either alone or with a husband that drinks and abuses, so I won't be complaining too much. But it is funny to see that I have become what my parents always wanted and not what I thought I wanted. But it is okay, I mean I have a good life, I love my husband and he loves me, and Chica fills up a part of my heart that I never thought existed.
But why do I feel like my life's just rushing by?
